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Mirror Match
—Susuki—
Nanato and I first met in May of our first year in middle school. I always had good physical abilities I could pride myself in, so I was a candidate for being a regular despite only having joined the club. Of course, the other seniors in my club didn’t like that all too much. Being cute and physically blessed, I received a lot of jealousy. If I had been their senior, they might have admired me instead, though. Even so, I wouldn’t back down no matter what they said, often ending up fighting it out with them. Since I trained in karate from a young age, I always showed confidence that I wouldn’t lose in a fight.
“Okay, Ootsuka is the one cleaning up today. The others, go home~”
For some reason, those very seniors now pushed all the cleaning onto Minami. Hopeless to the bone, I see.
“Let’s all do it and get it over with quickly?” I complained to those seniors.
“Then help her? We’re out.”
The other first-year student gave us a terrified look and then followed the other seniors. It really felt like people could be rather cold to their comrades, but she was probably scared to be targeted by those seniors if she helped me.
“Sorry, Ikumi-chan,” Minami apologized as she helped me.
“Why don’t you fight back for once?”
“…No way I could do that.”
“It’s because you’re this weak that you always end up a plaything for them.”
Since Minami was rather cute and good-looking, too, she also received a lot of jealousy from the seniors, but she didn’t fight back like me, so this happened often.
“I’ll do the rest, so you can head home.”
“Really? Thanks.”
One of the seniors came back to check up on us, so I had a bad feeling and sent Minami home.
“Phew…Finally done.”
I finished putting away all the basketballs and put away the net, finishing all the necessary cleaning-up. I was thinking those seniors would come back to complain about me again, but none of that happened, leaving me bewildered.
“H-Hey?!”
However, the door to the storage room suddenly was closed, as I heard the sound of the door being locked. They…They really got me good. I could hear them snickering from outside the storage room, too.
“Open up!”
I slammed my fists against the door several times, but no response followed. They probably intend to leave me to rot here and when this gets out, play dumb and say they didn’t realize. But forget about that, I should focus on getting out of here. I refuse to spend a whole night here. Because of the lights being broken, it was pitch-black, too. I’m absolutely terrified of the dark to the point I leave a light on whenever I sleep, so my body already began shaking.
“Are you kidding me…”
Despair assaulted me as my knees gave in. If I didn’t stay glued to the faint light coming from the gap between the doors, I might just really pass out. I never once cried in front of other people or at school, but I couldn’t control myself.
“Please…Somebody…”
I prayed someone would save me. Since the time for the club was already over, I doubt anybody would come here to the gym hall. My parents will probably be worried because I’m not coming home, but they had no way of knowing I’d be here. I just embraced my knees and tried to bear the terror.
“Holy?! You scared the crap out of me!”
Suddenly, the door swung open, and I heard a boy’s flustered voice. Raising my head, I met eyes with the boy.
“Oh, Susuki from the girls’ basketball club?”
He seemed to know me, but I had no idea who he was.
“Erm…What are you doing here?”
“I saw that you guys were done with your practice so I came to practice by myself. Today, we boys couldn’t use the gym hall, right? But I needed practice to beat my rival.”
To my surprise, the boy was diligent enough to come practice even after club activities were done already. But this diligence is what saved me. The relief allowed my legs to stop shaking, too.
“Also, that’s my line. Why are you hiding in here?”
“I happened to get locked in here by accident.”
I kept the part about my seniors a secret. I wouldn’t want him to get wrapped up in all the trouble with them.
“So you’re a clumsy crybaby.”
“I’m not crying.” I hurriedly wiped my tears and stood up, pretending like nothing happened.
“Actually, you’re hella good at basketball, right? Teach me some.”
“I don’t mind, but how about you tell me your name first?”
“I’m Amami Nanato from the boys’ basketball club. I guess I really have a weak presence…”
He tried to score a cool shot, but it just bounced off the ring.
“Your shooting form is all messed up. You suck way too much.”
“That’s why I’m practicing right now, geez.”
After that conversation, I continued to teach him some more. His lack of talent was utterly ridiculous, but even so, it made me have fun for the first time in forever. This was my first official meeting with Nanato, and thanks for helping him, I joined his after-school practice pretty much daily. Then there was Itsuki, who kept telling me how hard Nanato was working behind the scenes, and I added Minami into our group for us four to become good friends. Practicing with everyone was a lot of fun, and I felt happy every day. Eventually, Minami and I were forced to leave the club because we got set up by our seniors again, but instead of practicing, we just hung out as friends instead.
Up to that point, I always tried to play tough and never show any weakness, but Nanato always looked after me, always helping me. As the expected result, I fell in love with him and mustered up the courage to confess. We started dating shortly after, but Minami suddenly told me he was already going out with a girl from another middle school, ruining everything. I had trusted him, which made the shock even greater. I thought he was the only one who’d be different, but I guess all people are trash. In the end, our relationship lasted for only three days, and I spent the rest of my days holed up in my shell.
Only Minami stayed with me, and she even began attending the same high school as me. I never wanted to think about Nanato again, but the more time passed, the more rational my thinking became, as a certain doubt filled my head. Was he really two-timing me? Minami showed me pictures of him with another girl and some social media exchanges, so I believed it right away. However, I think the shock just made me go crazy, not considering his side at all. Even the supposed proof she showed me I never got a good look at because I was so beside myself. And these regrets led me to think about him more.
I wanted to meet him once more to find out the truth back then, but I gave up since we were already attending different schools. But as a miracle unfolded in front of me, we ended up working at the same part-time job. Surely, this must be some form of destiny.
Since it was time to head for school, I went to Minami’s home to pick her up.
“Morning, Ikumi-chan!” Minami leaped at me while yawning.
“A bit too close.”
Minami would always stick close to me like this. If I’m not careful, she even goes for my chest, butt, or legs. But since she’d sulk right away, I can’t exactly push her away, either. Of course, it’s not like I hate it that badly. Losing Minami would mean I would end up all alone again, so I had to treat her kindly. Even at the new school, I’m completely alone without her.
“You don’t seem too energetic today. What’s wrong?”
“Was just thinking about stuff.”
Since the day I found out that Nanato and I were colleagues at work, I keep thinking about him. He even helped me with that nasty man who caused trouble at the store. I bet he despises me, but he still stepped in. He really loves to meddle and is kind to the point it’s frustrating, but knowing that he didn’t change much somehow gave me relief.
“How is your work going?”
“Barely anything to do, so it’s easy. And I get along with one of my colleagues.”
Minami looked for a job near mine and started working at a juice store. I’m a bit worried if she can do her job properly, but I guess she’s doing just fine.
“Must be one hell of a girl if she can get along with you.”
“She’s called Yuzuyu-chan, and she gives off the same scent as me.”
After we became friends with Nanato and Itsuki, Minami started opening up a lot more, even smiling. Because of my fault, she got separated from them, so I feel responsible for her to some level.
“How about you, Ikumi-chan?”
“…Nanato is working there, too.”
“Hueh?!”
“He’s my co-worker.”
I told him about what happened. I didn’t want her to worry about me hiding something, so I came clean.
“That’s the worst…What are you gonna do now?” Minami looked at me with dampened eyes.
“I couldn’t believe it at first, too…”
I thought it was some bad prank, but now…I’m fine with it. But of course, in front of him, I still tense up. I keep acting cold and unfriendly.
“You wanna make up with him?”
“…I don’t know.”
“You’re not honest at all. If you want it that way, then I’ll help you.”
I often get told that I’m not being honest. Sometimes, I even say the exact opposite of what I think. But, Nanato understood me that way, always being considerate.
“No need to do anything unnecessary.”
“Okay, I won’t.”
Minami seemed to be plotting something. That said, she wasn’t the person to cross any boundary, so I guess there’s no need for me to worry.
*
Classes ended, so I headed to my part-time job. I was always dubious as to how Nanato would end up at a crepe store, but I remembered him liking sweet stuff and eating crepes together a lot.
“Yo.”
Entering the changing room, Nanato was already done preparing. I wanted to return the greeting, but the words got stuck in my throat, leaving me speechless. He figured I was gonna start changing, so he rushed out, leaving me no chance to say anything.
“What am I so scared of…”
I just tense up when faced with Nanato. I slapped my face with both my hands, telling myself that not saying anything will mean that I have lost.
“Good afternoon.”
The moment I stepped out of the room, I greeted him.
“Huh? Ah, err, yeah, hey.”
Nanato was clearly bewildered at this. Since his being flustered was always fun to watch, I remember teasing him a lot to see his face.
“Thanks for last time, by the way.”
“I just did it for my own sake, nothing more.”
Nanato has always been like this, not accepting any gratitude and only saying he did it for himself. That’s also what I liked about him.
“What is your high school like?” I put out the first topic I thought about beforehand.
“Honestly, not that different from middle school. I didn’t join a club, either, so I’m pretty much only studying.”
“You had no sense for basketball after all. I think it was the right choice for you to quit.”
“Zip it.”
Ah…I was acting cold again. Well, it is a fact, but I could have phrased that more nicely.
“Did you get a girlfriend?”
“No, I didn’t…?”
“I see.”
I found myself relieved at hearing his response. It’s like my body felt lighter.
“What about you?”
“Don’t have anybody.”
“Gotcha…To be honest, I happened to see you walking around the shopping mall with Ootsuka and two other guys the other day.”
“They just forced me to tag along, but I was bored so I headed home early.”
So he saw me that day. Some boys from our class invited us, but it was clear that they had ulterior motives so I was feeling unpleasant for most of that.
“Pretty cold.”
“I don’t have enough time to waste it with some random boys that aren’t worth anything.”
They would go for any kind of physical contact as long as I show my opening. They would start singing while looking at me at karaoke. They would not even get a strike at bowling and still ask for a high-five. All of it…unpleasant.
“You’re looking down too much.”
“…You’re partially to be blamed for that.”
“Me?”
“It’s nothing.”
I have a bad habit of comparing other men to Nanato. It made me feel like I would be losing if I didn’t get together with a guy better than him. That’s why everything ends up comparable to him. But no matter how hard I looked, I couldn’t find someone better than her. So much so that it was discouraging.
“Sorry, I’m gonna head to the restroom for a second.”
“Okay. But be back soon or you’re gonna get a cut in salary.”
“You don’t have any right to decide that?!”
He hurriedly left the front of the store. Usually, this is the time when more customers arrive.
“Welcome.”
As expected, there is one. A high school girl, too, with typical gal fashion. She looked around like she was looking for something. I feel like I’ve seen her before…
“One Nanato Special, please.”
“What?”
Receiving an unusual order, I couldn’t hide my bewilderment. And yet, Nanato’s name came up. Does she know him?
“Oh, I thought this was it.”
“I’m sorry…”
How could I understand that?! We don’t have something like that on the menu!
“Weird…I thought Nanato would be working here today.”
So she really does know him. And calling him by his first name means they’re pretty close, too…Ah, I remember now! She’s the problem child gal barely keeping her clothes within school regulations, Chiba Reina. I remember her getting awfully close to Nanato in our third year, which especially pissed me off. She did level down her gal look even more than I barely realized. Which is weird, because she’s going the opposite route of a typical gal. That said, looking at her white skirt, she must be attending the same school as Nanato. I heard she was pretty stupid, so how did she manage to get into the same school as him and Itsuki? Did she use the backdoor? What kind of talent would she need to achieve that?
“But I wanna eat the Nanato Special!”
No, she definitely looks like an idiot. Also, what even is the Nanato Special?
“Are you Amami’s girlfriend or something?”
“Wueh?! No, um, I’m embarrassed to say this, so please just take a guess.”
What is this girl saying? Nanato said he doesn’t have a girlfriend, so I bet she’s just got one-sided feelings. I don’t ever see him dating someone like her, though. And if I lost against someone like her, I might just blow up in rage. Is this what I think it is? Some nasty stalker clinging to Nanato no matter what? I bet Nanato must have seen her and ran away to hide in the toilet.
“Amami isn’t here today.”
“Waaaht? This sucks. Maybe I got the day wrong?”
She seemed disappointed and then left. I think I did well there.
“Sorry, I’m back.”
Right as the woman left, Nanato returned. I guess he really waited for her to be gone.
“I guess you’ve got a lot to worry about, huh?”
“Hm?”
I didn’t want him to be indebted to me, so I kept quiet about the fact that I chased her away.
“Ah, we got a customer. I’m gonna make the order, so you go take it and handle the payment.”
“Yes, yes. You really are an idiot when it comes to crepes.”
Making the crepe took a lot more work, and yet he always asked to handle it himself. Thanks to that, I can take it easy, and watching him work his hardest to make the crepe was pretty entertaining, too.
““Thank you very much.””
We finished dealing with the customer and watched them leave. Since we always were a good fit in these things, our shared work proceeded smoothly. I always thought that working part-time to earn money would be a pain, but being with him allows me to have fun, too. Being with him is fun to me. I guess I still—
—Reina—
After classes ended, I came to the shopping mall with Shibayu. I heard that Nanato would be working part-time today, so I wanted his Nanato Special, but when I got there, Nanato wasn’t around. The employee even said he didn’t have a shift today, so maybe I really just misheard. Also, that employee…She looked oddly familiar. But, I can’t remember at all. I just hated her voice.
“Huh? Didn’t you go get a crepe made by Amamicchi?”
Coming back empty-handed, Shibayu gave me a worried look.
“He wasn’t there.”
“Weird…Yuzu also heard he was working today.”
“Maybe he’s meeting up with Shiroki in secret?”
I couldn’t help but imagine the worst-case scenario.
“That’s definitely not happening. Tsubasa-chan has a shift today, too. Because after you went to get the crepe, Yuzu snuck off to check up on her.”
“Oh, that’s a relief.”
I guess it wasn’t the worst-case scenario after all.
“But, this is weird…Maybe he’s got himself a woman other than you or Tsubasa-chan?”
“What did you say?! No, that can’t be…”
I thought Shiroki was my only rival, but it wouldn’t be too weird for there to be a third girl. He’s a great guy, and because of his kindness, he’d probably build up a lot of flags with a random girl.
“Just kidding. You really turn into an idiot when Amamicchi’s involved.”
“Don’t scare me like that…And don’t call me an idiot!”
She made fun of me because I worried too much. Anybody would dumb down when it came to the person they like. Even the other day when I was fantasizing at home, four hours passed in the blink of an eye.
“Also, if I don’t proceed with the next step soon, things will be pretty bad.”
The operation to make him my fake boyfriend has worked wonders, but as time passed on, our classmates have been giving us less and less attention. Thanks to this whole thing, I managed to stop Shiroki from going on dates with him or clinging to him at school, so my defense may be perfect, but I can’t be assertive, either. Pretending to be a couple doesn’t automatically mean we can go on dates, and if he declined that, I might really just cry. The whole pretend business also acts to seal my actions. It looks like Shiroki accepted the situation, but there’s a good chance she’s plotting something behind the scenes.
“What do you want to do?”
“I want him to hug me.”
“Your desires are showing.”
“I wanna be lovey-dovey! I want us to hang out as just the two of us!”
Especially since Nanato started working part-time, we can’t spend much time together anymore. And I’m gonna start working at the same sports goods shop as Hirose next week, so I’ll have even less time. Thinking about it that way, I feel lonely. I need more Nanato.
“Why not invite him over under the pretense of studying? Luckily, end-of-term exams are coming up.”
“Hmm…But we’ll just end up going to a nearby cafe or library.”
Studying with him in my room…Holy smokes, that’s so hot! That would be crazy!
“And getting him to just hang out with me would probably be pretty hard. I could totally see him inviting everyone.”
I was excited for a moment, but thinking about it rationally, I couldn’t see that sort of thing happening.
“Surely, he’ll be willing if you ask him for it to be just the two of you, right?”
“Of course. Knowing how kind he is, he’ll definitely agree. But I don’t want to force him to do anything because it just leaves a bad impression.”
I don’t want him to think of me as annoying or pestering. With Shiroki as a strong rival, any minus I get will be a plus for her.
“What if Yuzu invites Tsubasa-chan to study together so that you can invite him for your own private study session? Last year, you often did that, right?”
“Yeah…But that was always somewhere in public.”
Back then, just being with him was enough to make me happy, but now I need to actually be able to touch him or I won’t be satisfied. I want to touch his hair!
“Oh, it’s Yuzuyu-chan.”
A girl about to pass by us suddenly stopped and called out to Shibayu. She was wearing a uniform from a different school, so maybe they’d known each other for some time.
“Ah, Minami-chan? I thought you didn’t have a shift today?”
“Yup, I am here for a different reason.”
Looks like they’re colleagues. That means she must know Shiroki, too. She had short blonde hair, and although she was relatively cute, I couldn’t stand her for some reason.
“A date by any chance?”
“Just talking with a friend.”
“Aw, just a friend, huh.”
The girl then looked over at me, as her warm gaze changed into a cold glare, like she couldn’t stand me.
“Here, here, here!”
“Heeey, stop tickling Yuzu!”
The girl suddenly leaped at Shibayu, making me feel like they were rather close for supposedly being friends. I don’t think much time has passed since they’ve met, either. I guess this is just Shibayu’s special talent.
“I’ll give you a call later, Yuzuyu-chan.”
“Yup, Yuzu is here whenever.”
Shibayu watched the girl walk off. Close enough to even talk on the phone, huh?
“Shibayu, I think you should choose your friends more carefully.”
“Huuuh? Why?”
“That girl just now seems really nasty.”
Just watching their exchange was enough to make me feel like something was off. Her hairstyle, look in her eyes, makeup, accessories, way she’s talking…All of that really speaks volumes about a person.
“Yeah, probably. Yuzu could feel it sipping through here and there. She can’t even get along with Tsubasa-chan. Can you imagine?”
“So why are you being friendly with her?”
I couldn’t understand Shibayu’s thoughts.
“Just because she has a bit of a problematic personality doesn’t mean Yuzu dislikes her. Yuzu likes Tsubasa-chan because she’s the light, and she likes Minami-tan because she’s the darkness.”
“I don’t understand that one bit, but go off, queen.”
She loves saying weird stuff, huh? I understand that being open and positive is good, but I’m worried she might get wrapped up in something…
*
The following day, when recess rolled around, Shibayu approached me. Nanato was talking with Hirose and some other boys about their favorite music.
“From what I heard, Amamicchi’s limping behind with his studies.”
“So I guess he can’t teach me…”
The idea was to invite Nanato over so he could teach me, but I guess that won’t work.
“How did you do at the last midterms, Reinan?”
“5th in this class.”
“…The way you talk and act makes you look like an idiot, but you’re pretty clever.”
“That first part was unnecessary.”
At the previous midterms, everyone seemed to be struggling, but since I was listening to the explanations during class, I didn’t have that much of a problem.
“But isn’t that a chance, then?”
“What do you mean?”
“You could teach Amamicchi. Call it a one-on-one study session, and that’ll allow you to be alone with him.”
“I see, I see.”
I also have to repay Nanato for teaching me so much back in middle school, so this would be the perfect chance.
“Private tutor Reinan’s gonna give him lots of juicy and thick private lessons—The operation.”
“Can you not make it sound like we’re gonna do something indecent?”
I never thought about doing the reverse. Shibayu really comes up with some great ideas.
“But you gotta teach him lots…Like love, for example!”
“Are you stupid? He needs help so I’m gonna take this seriously.”
“You’re acting as the diligent one now? Why not wear a swimsuit while teaching him?”
“No way I could do that!”
Shibayu threw another weird idea into the room. I did imagine how that would turn out for a moment, but I would probably die from the embarrassment.
“Yuzu’s gonna head to the toilet real quick.”
“Off you go.”
She headed for the bathroom, so I started thinking about how to raise the results of teaching Nanato. And studying at my home with him…Just thinking about it makes me grin. Taking a break, he’d lie down on my bed, only to eventually fall asleep. That would allow me to kiss him without him knowing. He then would wake up, but I would continue despite his bewilderment. He’d get into the mood and push me down in bed. He’d do as he pleases with me, and then he’ll take responsibility…Five years later, we’ll have built a happy family.
“Reina-san, your face looks a bit red. Are you okay?”
“Fueh?!”
As I was completely lost in thoughts, Shiroki suddenly approached me, forcing me to let out a weird voice.
“Huh? I’m still 16?”
“What are you talking about? We’re in high school. First-year, too.”
In my memories, I was already 21 with a child and a happy family, so my conception of time was completely messed up.
“So, what’s up, Shiroki?”
“Nothing much. You were just beet-red in the face, so I was wondering if something happened and I was worried.”
I guess I was too engrossed in my own world and acted weirdly. How embarrassing.
“The end-of-term exams are around the corner, right? Are you doing okay in terms of your studies, Reina-san?”
“No problems.”
“Okay…Well, Nanato-kun said he was struggling a bit, so I thought of teaching him. I was wondering if you were doing fine because we could have gotten together as a big group, but it looks like you don’t need my help.”
That woman…She was thinking the exact same thing as me.
“No need to worry about Nanato. I’ll teach him.”
I can’t back down here. I want to study again with him, just the two of us.
“But, you have your own studies to worry about, right? Can you afford to teach someone else?”
“Affordable like a lollipop.”
Shiroki seems pretty clever as far as I can see. She ranked third during the last midterms, too, and I bet she had no problem getting in here.
“How did you do in math? That’s what he struggles with the most. I had 84.”
“I had 87.”
She tried to get the upper hand bragging about her results, but I’m not gonna let her. Truth be told, I actually had 81, but from afar, it might look like 87.
“Also, I already decided that I’m going to help him study. He taught me a lot in middle school, so now it’s my turn.”
“That’s just you being selfish.” Shiroki seemed oddly angry for once as she glared at me.
“You got a problem with that?” I glared back at her.
“The reason Nanato-kun has to act as your fake boyfriend is because you didn’t think about his feelings and just acted according to your own desires. Do you think anything goes as long as you’re okay with it?”
“I do feel bad about that…”
“I went through so much trouble because of your actions, Reina-san. I can’t even be with him to talk, and I can’t invite him anywhere outside, so I had to invite him over to my place.”
“…Hm? Come again?”
She just said she invited him over to her place, right? So that’s a mega plus! What I want to do…she already did?!
“Then let me have him this time.”
“Why would you say that?!”
I knew Shiroki was doing something behind the scenes. Knowing that, I won’t step down. It’s not fair to have him over…Who knows what they did! If it was me, I would definitely do everything I can to teach him properly.
“But I said no!”
“You’re so selfish, Reina-san!”
Since we started a genuine fight, we began gathering attention from our other classmates.
“H-Hey, what’s going on here?”
Of course, Nanato came rushing over.
“I was just telling her that I’m gonna teach you.”
“W-Wait!”
First come, first serve. I’m not letting her get any space.
“Is this about me?”
“No, it’s not. Reina-san was just…” Shiroki tried to assure him, showing that she was his ally, which really pissed me off.
“But it does involve you, Nanato. She’s just trying to make herself look better.”
“Why are you saying that? Then just do what you want, I don’t care anymore!”
“You should care!”
We continued to bark at each other. Originally, I was supposed to be enjoying a happy high school life with Nanato, but Shiroki just keeps stalking him like a stalker, getting in my way. That said, in her eyes, I might be the stalker who won’t leave him alone. No way the two of us could even get along…
—Nanato—
During recess, Tsubasa and Reina suddenly got into a fight. I was talking with Itsuki and friends when I heard something going on, but I had no idea what was happening. I got between the two when Shibayu and Itsuki joined. Shibayu talked with Tsubasa, and Itsuki looked after Reina. Witnessing all this, people started to talk among themselves. In the end, neither of them said anything weird to each other, just preaching in silence. I didn’t even get to hear the reason this all exploded, but Reina made it abundantly clear that this involved me.
“Maybe they got in a fight because Amami-kun got along with another girl even though he has a girlfriend?”
“Both of them are childhood friends, after all. I bet things are rough behind the scenes.”
Rumors started spreading. I just hope they don’t cook up something entirely false and untrue…
Lunch break arrived, but by the time we all started eating, the atmosphere had gotten even heavier.
“Tsubasa-chan, your lunch looks heavenly.”
“…I guess so.”
Shibayu tried to break the ice, but Tsubasa acted like she’d rather be left alone.
“You started working part-time a while back, right? How’s that going, Chiba?”
“…Not too shabby.”
Itsuki tried the same as Shibayu, but failed even more. They both looked at me, asking me to do something. I want them to smile again…And ease the mood a bit. I guess I can only change the topic with a light-hearted attempt.
“The other day, I went to the convenience store with my bike late at night. I finished shopping and headed back, but only realized after getting to my flat that I forgot my bike. I’m such an idiot, haha.”
“…”
Huh? Weird. I thought this would be a funny story to make everyone laugh at me.
“I forgot my keys or wallet before, but my bike is an entirely different thing.”
“…”
Everyone looked at me like they were waiting for the punchline. What a hellish scene. When I was a child, my parents ordered New Year’s snacks online. We were all looking forward to the delicious-looking food. But when we looked inside, it was a jumbled mess, not looking like the pictures at all. My parents were shocked, freezing up on the spot. The atmosphere then reminds me of now. A desire to scream in terror filled my body.
“Itsuki, kill me.”
Unable to bear the silence, I wished for death for the first time in my life.
“Don’t rush ahead now. I admire your courage for taking on this challenge.”
We tried all sorts of things, but the atmosphere remained as tense as before. It really was like there was no helping the rift between Tsubasa and Reina. That reminds me, something similar happened when we went to the karaoke box some time ago. I guess continuing like this really wouldn’t work. I’m sure the fight erupted because of me. Tsubasa said she still sees me as her fiancé. Meanwhile, Reina indirectly confessed that she loves me. And these feelings probably created this situation, making it impossible for them to be close like this.
To ensure we can all get along from now on, to make sure we don’t get separated like before, I have to make a choice. Whichever choice I may make, it will end up hurting someone. So then, I should—
*
Classes ended, so my shift at the crepe store began once again. I should really focus on work, but in my head, I could only think about Reina and Tsubasa. What should I do? I can’t find the right answer. I bet there is no right answer. One of them will be hurt.
“What’s wrong? You seem rather pale today,” Susuki looked at me, worried.
It’s been a few days since that man threw around complaints, and we became able to talk a lot more openly.
“I’m troubled by something.”
“I-I don’t mind hearing you out.”
Hearing this offer from Susuki, I felt happy. I guess she’s actually worried about me. Since she’s an outsider to our group, she might have some valuable stance that could give me a push in the right direction. And it’s better to talk about something than keep it bottled up.
“The thing is, I’m in a group of four other friends.”
“Yes.”
“It’s Itsuki and I, as well as three other girls.”
“Ohh?” Susuki gave me a cold look for some reason.
I guess maybe she’s not as willing as I thought.
“Anyway, it looks like two of those girls have feelings for me.”
“…I really wonder what’s good about a guy like this.”
She’s right. I feel like this is nothing short of a miracle.
“And because of that, those two tend to fight a lot, so it made the atmosphere in the group worse. They’re not even talking anymore.”
“I guess that’s just out of your control.”
“That’s why I have to make a choice. Decide on which of those two I want to date.”
Saying it like this, I realize what a first-world problem this really is.
“Just choose the one you like more?”
That’s right. Everything is resolved if I choose the girl I like. But, I…
“…I like both of them. That’s why I can’t choose.”
“You’re trash.”
Her words were as harsh as always, but I can’t argue back.
“They’re both important to me, and I don’t want to hurt either of them. And spending time in our friend group is fun, so I don’t want to ruin what we have right now.”
“How greedy can you be?”
I know that there’s no convenient answer. There’s nothing to gain if you don’t sacrifice something.
“What am I supposed to do…”
Tsubasa is someone I’ve known for as long as I could think of. She’s incredibly important to me, and she’s liked me all this time, even coming to Tokyo to meet me again. She still hasn’t forgotten our promise of being engaged, trying to support me in any way she can. Reina I went through with the entrance exams, as we’ve supported each other through the hard times. Without her, I probably wouldn’t have made it to Komaba High, and I wouldn’t have had this much fun. They’re both just as important to me. I can’t ever hope to replace them. I can’t just choose one of them to hurt the other.
“If it was me, I would probably start dating someone entirely outside your friend group.” Susuki brought an unexpected option to the table.
“Meaning?”
“If you start going out with someone not part of that group, then those other two will have to give up. You will be able to stay friends, and you’ll avoid most of the drama.”
“…I see. I didn’t even think about that.”
I was only thinking of choosing either of them, so the possibility of not going with either of them never occurred to me. If choosing one of them would end up hurting the other, then maybe choosing neither of them is the best course of action.
“If nobody gets hurt, there won’t be any rivalries in your friend group. And if you end up the bad guy, they might get along more, don’t you think?”
“Yeah…”
“That’s right. You try to fight everything head-on. Humans aren’t that strong, so you can always run away if it gets too much.”
If I can’t choose, then I don’t have to…It really resonated within my mind.
“Also, you’re actually giving this some serious thought, huh?”
“I’m not as rotten as to give you a half-baked answer, okay.”
She said, and I knew that her personality made it hard to discard someone who’s in trouble. And that was one of the traits I liked her for.
“But, there’s no way I could find someone outside my usual group that quickly.”
“Why not just lie about it at first? While things calm down, you can then look for someone.”
Yeah. At the very least, I can say I found someone I like. That way, the two of them will probably give up on me. But, there’s a limit to how long I can keep up a lie like that. I have to find someone.
“I mean, wouldn’t that girl hate this whole situation? There’s a group of friends I’m in that I would even prioritize…I don’t think there’s anybody as convenient as that on this earth.”
“…What about me?”
“Huh?”
Hearing her words, I doubted my ears.
“I was just joking. Relax.”
“O-Okay…?”
Her jokes are bad for my heart. But, I shouldn’t be too surprised. She clearly can’t stand my guts.
“But, there may be people who understand your situation if you just explain it to them. There might be someone who has guys she’s close with.”
“I see. So it wouldn’t just be my own side.”
There’s so many people in this world, each with their own problems and values. Someone might actually be willing to accept my situation.
“If I find someone who’d be willing, I’ll introduce you.”
“That would be helpful, but I bet you don’t even have any friends, so I’m not holding my breath.”
“Oh shut up. I have Minami.”
“That’s one,” I whispered in a quiet voice when she kicked my shin. “But…Thanks for hearing me out. I feel a bit better now.”
“You just take everything too seriously…”
Because I talked to Susuki, I have no more options. And that allowed me to see a faint light at the end of the tunnel.
CClaw Translations 