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Chapter 12
Opening the front entrance, I was greeted by the night scenery of the familiar residential district. Even the scorching asphalt had cooled down quite a lot. Today is the promised day of my summer festival date with Sako-san. I wore my geta sandals and regular summer clothes, heading for the nearest bus stop. On the way there, I already spotted several women wearing yukatas, making me look like I fit right in. I wonder, will Sako-san be wearing a yukata…or did she listen to my request and wear her casual clothes?
If she’s wearing a yukata, that’d be the perfect proof that she’s going rampant all in order to stop being perfect. So, which will it be? While waiting for the bus to arrive, I took out my smartphone. On the screen, I could see a message from Takumi, saying ‘Good luck in battle.’ I responded with a brief ‘I’ll do my best.’
Over the past few days, I received lots of advice from Takumi. Thanks to that, I think I can act like a proper escort for this date. I still think that Sako-san and I aren’t a good match, but I at least want her to enjoy the date. For that, acting above my league should be allowed. I put my phone away, and once again thought about the advice I got from Takumi.
‘Once you meet up, you have to praise her clothes.’
I don’t know if Sako-san will be wearing Western clothes or a yukata, but I have to praise her no matter the choice. As I was mentally practicing my lines, the bright lights of the bus cut through the evening darkness. The bus heading for the nearby shrine was already filled with families and couples. Unlike before, all of the passengers were smiling. It made me feel like I was the only one nervous.
***
My phone vibrated. It was a message from Tsuyoshi-kun, stating ‘The bus stop was crowded, so I’ll probably be a bit late.’ I sent him a short ‘Totally fine’ back. The place in front of the train station where we decided to meet up was already brimming with people. Today is the final chance I can meet Tsuyoshi-kun. My final chance to confess my feelings. In fact, I feel like crying every time I think about it, but I can’t relax. I have to win over Tsuyoshi-kun completely today. I took out my smartphone and used the camera to check if my hair and clothes were okay. I bought a new yukata with white and vermillion.
Since Tsuyoshi-kun said he wanted to see me in my casual clothes, I chose the yukata instead. Ignoring a boy’s request would make me the opposite of perfect. Mom went ahead and helped me tie up my hair to make it shake behind my head, revealing my neck. I also cut my bangs a bit to make them look as clumsy as they were when I first got rejected. Realizing that my preparations were perfect, I nodded to myself. I still look as cute as before, but my perfect image is ruined. Just as I planned.
Even so, I feel a bit anxious. Every time I saw a girl passing me by, I felt that the design of my yukata was too plain. I bet he’s not interested in a yukata in the first place, but I still want Tsuyoshi-kun to think of me as cute. My chest was filled with tension, and I averted my gaze from the crowd of people. I think it should be about time for him to arrive. With such an amount of visitors, it might be hard to spot him.
Not to mention that he thinks I’m wearing casual clothes, so maybe he won’t even be searching for me the way I look. I’d like to call out to him and surprise him. I’m looking forward to seeing his reaction now. He might just jump in shock—However, right as I was lost in thought, somebody called out to me instead.
“Sorry for the wait, Sako-san.”
“Wah, Tsuyoshi-kun?! That surprised me!”
I thought I was doing a well-done job looking around, yet Tsuyoshi-kun spotted me first. As expected, you could say, since Tsuyoshi-kun wore something completely different from what I assumed. He had his hair styled up a bit, revealing his gentle-looking eyes. On top of that, he wore a casual black short jacket with trousers. It looked a lot more mature than his school uniform. I want to tell him how handsome he looks. I want to praise him because it fits him great. But…my tongue wouldn’t work properly, I had a hard time forming the words. Not to mention that Tsuyoshi-kun got a head start.
“What a beautiful sight you are, Sako-san.”
My brain froze up completely. Did he just call me beautiful…? Even though it was a single word, my mind was incapable of understanding it. I managed to regain my composure and realized what he was talking about.
“Ah! You mean my yukata! It’s great, right? Mom said it would look beautiful on me, so she—”
“No, I meant that you look beautiful. The yukata is just an addition.”
My consciousness almost jumped out of my body, making me feel dizzy. My heart was racing painfully fast. I might just die.
“Are you okay?”
“Y-Yeah, I should be.”
I’m not okay at all.
“You cut your bangs as well, I see.”
“Yeah! It looks clumsy, right!”
“No, I think it suits you well.”
It’s over, my attempt to ruin my perfect image is failing.
“Let’s go?”
Tsuyoshi-kun took the lead, walking ahead of me with half a step. Something is off. Or rather, everything is off. Why is Tsuyoshi-kun wearing that? It’s almost as if he expected me to wear a yukata. Even though he said he didn’t want me to. Not to mention that he praised my looks. I guess it might be the norm to do that on a date with a girl, but it was so eerily natural…On top of that, he carefully stayed with me, so that I wouldn’t get lost despite awkwardly following him.
Nothing was going the way I wanted things to go, messing with my head. My legs wouldn’t work the way I wanted them to, not allowing me to walk properly. And yet, my body felt so light. I simply followed Tsuyoshi-kun with my head hanging low until we reached the big crowd, and I raised my head. The first thing that caught my eyes was the large temple arch, with various stalls lining up on both sides of the walk. The Japanese-style brick pavement tickled my curiosity.
The scent drifted towards us through the breeze was composed of not a single food, rather mixing sweet and spicy feelings that only heightened my appetite. Right before we passed the shrine arch, Tsuyoshi-kun turned around towards me.
“Is there something you’d like to eat?”
I first thought of bite-sized sponge cakes or chocolate bananas. Since we’re at a festival already, I’d like to try some sweets you can only buy during this time. But since I told Tsuyoshi-kun that I like salty food, I can’t reveal my sweet tooth here. It’s time for me to act again.
“Maybe some ikayaki? The scent of soy sauce is really pulling me over.” I answered, to which Tsuyoshi-kun blinked in confusion.
And after a brief silence, he spoke up.
“Hmmm…Not a candied apple?”
Candied apple! That’s my favorite food at a summer festival. But even so, I held back my desires.
“You know what I like to eat, right? Why would you ask about that?”
“You mentioned it before, but…Well, sure.” Tsuyoshi-kun gave a bewildered response and started walking towards the stall selling ikayaki.
I really don’t like ikayaki that much, but unlike the crab miso, I can at least eat it. I can’t let Tsuyoshi-kun see through my lie. After we walked for a few minutes, Tsuyoshi-kun suddenly came to a halt and took out his wallet.
“Huh? The ikayaki stall is up ahead, right?”
“Yep, but there’s something I want to eat.”
Tsuyoshi-kun moved to a stall and called out to a man with a towel around his neck.
“One candied apple, please.”
“Ayo, that’s 200 yen.”
Together with the change, Tsuyoshi-kun accepted the candied apple. I’m so jealous. I want to eat one as well. But because I lied to him, I can’t ask for a bite. Tsuyoshi-kun dropped his gaze on the candied apple and spoke up.
“I always wanted to try this.”
“H-Huh…”
The candied apple he held in his hand shone brightly as it was illuminated by the light from the stall. It looks so delicious, after all…I cursed myself for lying about something so stupid.
“So this is what it tastes like.” Tsuyoshi-kun took a bite from the apple, muttering his genuine impression. I could see the white meat from the apple, which made me gulp.
“Want a bite?”
“I-I’m fine, really.”
“Oh, okay. It looked like you wanted to try it.”
“No, I’m okay, really.”
I played strong, to which Tsuyoshi-kun showed a troubled smile. I realized that not even taking a single bite might seem a bit unnatural, and I felt apologetic. However, since the setting was for me to not like sweet stuff, it can’t be helped. After the candied apple, we now headed towards the ikayaki stall. The scent of hot soy sauce came from the front, and before I could even say anything, Tsuyoshi-kun spoke up already.
“Excuse me, one share of ikayaki please.”
“That’ll be 300 yen.”
Tsuyoshi-kun handed the person a 500-yen coin and accepted the change. I wasn’t even given the chance to take out my own wallet, as he nonchalantly treated me. It was a perfect example of how to escort a lady, but I was the only one nervous, probably. Every time he treated me kindly, I was overfilled with joy to the point I cursed myself.
“Here you go, Sako-san. Be careful of the sauce.”
“…Thanks.” I accepted the ikayaki and thanked him.
In return, Tsuyoshi-kun seemed a bit dubious.
“Why do you seem so displeased?”
“…You’re not playing fair today, Tsuyoshi-kun.”
It feels like my emotions are directly dancing on top of his palm.
“Not fair? What do you mean?”
“I don’t know, but it’s unfair.”
I want to make Tsuyoshi-kun’s heart race. That’s why I invited him here in the first place. As I was agonizing over this, Tsuyoshi-kun stepped away from the path.
“Let’s sit on the stone fence here and eat. Walking while eating ikayaki is pretty tough, no?”
“Y-Yeah…” I nodded when Tsuyoshi-kun opened up a handkerchief on the stone.
“Sit here.”
A boy offered me his handkerchief to sit on! I’ve seen that in a shojo manga before!
“But your handkerchief…”
“I wouldn’t want your yukata to get dirty.” He tapped his hand on the handkerchief, to which I reluctantly sat down.
“T-Thanks…”
“You’re welcome.” He narrowed his eyes as he smiled.
That warm expression made my heart skip a beat again. I sat down next to Tsuyoshi-kun. He’s so close. He might realize how much I’m blushing. Suddenly, he pushed the candied apple towards me.
“How about we trade?”
“Trade?”
“I really want to eat some ikayaki. A single bite should be fine, right?”
So he did realize that I wanted to eat the candied apple after all. It’s frustrating how sensitive he can be at times.
“You don’t want to?”
I looked at the candied apple. Tsuyoshi-kun had only taken a single bite from it. Maybe he bought it with the intention of giving it to me after all?
“Tsuyoshi-kun, you’re way too kind…”
“That’s an overstatement. I just want to trade.”
I started to care less and less about this initial setting I created. I had yet to take a bite from my ikayaki, which was more than enough proof. Right now, I just want to rely on Tsuyoshi-kun’s kindness and be spoiled by it.
“I’m sorry, can I take a bite after all…?”
“Go ahead.”
I accepted the candied apple and gave Tsuyoshi-kun the ikayaki. A significant bite was missing, making this an indirect kiss. However, the passion of the festival seemed to pull me along, as I wished for this indirect kiss to happen. I became aware of how perverted I was, yet still took a large bite.
“Mhm, delicious…”
Ever since I was small, I would always buy a candied apple when I visited a festival. It’s such a simple match, yet it has such a distinct flavor that I enjoy. It felt so nostalgic.
“I guess getting a candied apple was the right choice after all.”
“…Wha?”
I stuffed my cheeks without thinking when I saw Tsuyoshi-kun taking a close look at my face.
“What kind of face was I making…?”
“That’s a bit hard to explain, but I can tell that you really love candied apples.”
“I-I also like ikayaki!”
“Yeah, yeah.”
“You don’t believe me at all!”
Tsuyoshi-kun burst out laughing.
“You can have the rest of the candied apple. You like it, right?”
“No, I can’t…!”
“I bought it for you in the first place, so it’s fine.”
I knew it. He’s doing so much to make me happy. If the two of us started dating, would every single date be this way? I’m not sure my heart would be able to handle it, but I’d be the happiest person on earth. Tsuyoshi-kun was sitting next to me, stuffing his mouth with ikayaki. Today he’s not only very mature and manly but also relatively calm. Does he not feel anything while sitting next to me? He’s been doing a perfect job of escorting me today, but I’m not sure if he actually sees me as a girl. I felt the urge to test that.
“Then I’ll gladly take the rest, but how about you take one last bite?” I turned the part I had bitten off from towards Tsuyoshi-kun.
Even he should be hesitant when it comes to an indirect kiss.
“Yeah, sure.”
He didn’t accept the candied apple I pushed towards him but instead grasped my right hand holding onto it with both of his.
“Wha—”
Tsuyoshi-kun’s face suddenly appeared right in front of me. He directly bit off the candied apple, not minding that it was the part I took a bit off before.
“Thanks, that was delicious,” Tsuyoshi-kun spoke like nothing out of the ordinary happened, but I was too shocked to even say anything.
“By the way, what do we do about your ikayaki, Sako-san?”
Tsuyoshi-kun offered me the tray with the food on it.
“You can have all of it…”
I can’t anymore. After all that, I can’t take the lead from Tsuyoshi-kun. I’ll just let him escort me. If I try anything, it’ll just make me flustered. After he finished eating the ikayaki, we got up from the stone fence. We walked along the temple path once more, when I suddenly felt a dull pain assaulting my feet. I looked down, seeing that the geta strap bit into my skin, creating a red spot.
For a moment, I thought of telling Tsuyoshi-kun, but I decided against it. Knowing him, he’d definitely carry me on his back. And he’d do that with a straight face. He looked into my eyes and asked.
“Where should we go next?”
“Maybe the shooting range?”
“Sounds good.”
He still stayed half a step ahead of me, showing off his back. It was a bit smaller than your average boy’s, but it felt a lot more reliable than usual. Having me piggyback ride him would be embarrassing, but I wanted to hop on there at least once. And I want to gently wrap my arms around his neck. Tsuyoshi-kun may be acting off today, but I wasn’t normal either. I should be happy the way things are right now, and yet I find myself wishing for more. Wanting to hold hands, coming here again next year, him becoming my boyfriend, all of that.
As my head was going crazy, I simply trotted after Tsuyoshi-kun. From then on, we went to check the various stalls. We barely exchanged any words, but the fact that we were experiencing this moment together made me feel satisfied nonetheless. By the time we played around a lot and ate lots of food, the crowd grew smaller, and it was easier for us to walk. The go-home mood started to fill the air.
“Guess we should head home as well.”
“Yep.” I nodded along.
My heart couldn’t be more satisfied, so my desire to be with him longer almost felt impure to me. That’s just how much fun I had. Past the temple road, I saw the familiar arches. I can only get to walk with Tsuyoshi-kun for a bit longer. That thought alone made my feet feel heavy. The faint voices from the other people, the burning scent of soy sauce, the bright illumination, all my five senses absorbed this one moment. I wanted to close the distance between us just a bit further, so I approached Tsuyoshi-kun.
—And that’s when it happened. A sharp pain ran through my leg, making me trip. In a panic, I reached for Tsuyoshi-kun’s hand. Our bodies bumped into each other, as he half embraced me. My chest was pressed against him.
“Y-You okay?”
I heard a squeaky, flustered voice. When I looked up, I saw Tsuyoshi-kun blushing as he looked into my eyes. It seems that the last one really got him. If I had to guess, his heart must be racing right about now.
“Sorry, I tripped and almost fell over.”
The pain on my foot only got worse, and yet I couldn’t care less about any of that. My fingers slipped in between Tsuyoshi-kun’s. It’s what you would call a lovers’ handhold.
“S-Sako-san, your hand is…”
“What about my hand?”
“Well…”
Tsuyoshi-kun averted his eyes. His reaction was far too obvious. I could feel the sweat between our fingers. Was it mine, or his? It was probably a mixture of both of ours. He’s conscious of me as a girl. That fact alone made me so happy, I put more strength into my grip. With our shoulders next to each other, we moved forward to the arch. Since we have to head in different directions to get home, we have to split up as soon as we pass that arch. I have to let go of this hand. I focused my entire being on the shape of Tsuyoshi-kun’s hand so that I won’t forget it, taking one slow step after another. Almost as if to carefully taste every single one.
Ten steps left, nine, eight—Right as I finished counting, Tsuyoshi-kun stopped.
“I have to head this way, so…” He said, his face still beet red.
Our fingers unraveled, and my arm dangled next to me.
“Ah…”
Right as my hand became free, almost as if the magic had worn off, I remembered something. Today is the last day I get to be with Tsuyoshi-kun. I was so happy this entire time, I missed my chance to even tell him of my feelings again. I frantically opened my mouth, but no voice came out. I had prepared the right words. Yet, I can’t remember them. I was panicking too much to stay rational.
“See you, Sako-san.”
I have to say something—I told myself and frantically used my head. But in the end, empty words were all I could mutter.
“…It was…fun.”
“Really? I’m glad. Thanks for inviting me.”
“Likewise, thanks for coming with me.”
“See you.” Tsuyoshi-kun raised his hand, waving it.
“Yep, bye.” I waved my hand as well.
Tsuyoshi-kun gently smiled and headed towards the bus stop. His back grew more and more distant. I reflexively reached out for him with my hand, but he was too far already. Finally, he walked around the corner and vanished entirely. My empty hand wouldn’t stop shaking. The darkness of the night crept up to it, making it feel ice cold. It’s like the cold breeze stole all the warmth I had.
After I started walking again, I remembered the pain at the top of my foot. Because of the open wound, the geta strap was red from my blood.
“I couldn’t…say I like him…”
Thinking about it now, there really wasn’t any need to worry too much. I only wanted to tell him three words. But this is fine. If I confessed the day before we would end up separated, it’d only trouble Tsuyoshi-kun.
***
The second I took the corner, I leaned against the fence of the shrine and sighed. I don’t think Sako-san will be able to see me here. I didn’t even have the strength to head to the bus stop. Right before we split up, a few meters up to the arch, we held hands. It happened out of nowhere which left me confused, and I don’t exactly remember the sensation. All I know is that it completely erased the small amount of stamina I had left. I was practically riddled with wounds.
I booted up my smartphone, seeing that I got a message from Takumi, saying ‘How did it go?’
‘I’m tired.’ I responded, to which I got an immediate response.
‘What, you didn’t get to enjoy your date or something?’
‘I was too busy following your advice.’
‘But Sako should be satisfied, then?’
‘Who knows, I’m not too confident.’
‘You didn’t manage to pull off a perfect date?’
‘I don’t think it was perfect…’
Today’s date was a test run to see if we could become the other person’s ideal partner. Sako-san was acting like an imperfect girl, wearing the yukata instead of her casual clothes, cutting her bangs, and didn’t eat her favorite food. At the same time, I tried my best to act manly and escort her. Basically, we both should have acted the way the other person feels most comfortable. I personally think it’s fine for Sako-san to stay perfect, but all of this was necessary for us to line up. And yet…
‘I wonder, something doesn’t feel right.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Sako-san wanted us to be a better match and stopped acting perfect. At the same time, using your advice, I tried to change my good-for-nothing self into someone worthy of her.’
Thinking back on it, I was really forcing myself to be kind to her. Normally I wouldn’t be able to call her beautiful. That’s why I feel so exhausted now. Before Takumi could respond, I sent him another message.
‘I’m starting to think if what we did was wrong, after all. When being with people, would you really adjust to the other person to such an extent?’
I’m pretty sure the date this time worked out quite well. And yet, why did I first think of being exhausted instead of ‘That was fun’? I thought this was the correct relationship for us, and yet it feels like we’re not matching up at all. After a bit of time passed, Takumi sent me his response.
‘It’s because you two are doing what a couple with a height difference would.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘When the girl is taller than the man, she’d wear low sneakers, and the man would wear tall boots with thick soles. That’s how they aim for their ideal height difference. I told you before, right?’
Now that he mentioned it, I faintly remember hearing about that. Sako-san and I are just trying to shrink the distance between us in different ways.
‘But, you know?’ Takumi continued. ‘Even if you do that, the difference won’t go away. It depends on how you look at it, but I think it’s best to accept your differences and be proud of them.’
‘You mean it’s okay even if we aren’t the best fit?’
‘Exactly. If the people in the relationship are satisfied with it, then there’s no need to bother about the eyes of other people.’
I finally understood what Takumi was trying to say. Even if our relationship may be awkward, it doesn’t matter as long as we’re happy.
‘You think Sako-san and I can stay the way we are right now?’
‘Yeah. There’s no need to change. However, I shouldn’t have given you this kind of advice for your date, my bad. What’s important is that you can stay as you are, and accept each other.’
Takumi was trying to press his point even further, but I still felt hesitant despite that. Even during today’s date, matching up with each other worked out quite well. But at the same time, just as Takumi is saying, I felt like it’d be fine to just be who we really are.
‘Thanks for hearing me out. I’ll think about it some more.’
‘Ayo.’
If I’m fine the way I am right now, then all my effort to catch up to Sako-san would be meaningless. But…is it really that simple of a story? Can I really start dating Sako-san without having anything I can pride myself in? Can I stay the same while she’s trying to match me? Met with these choices, a dull pain raced through my head. I don’t think I can find my answer right now. For now, I just decided to think about it while slowly heading home.
***
The people heading home from the festival gradually passed through the ticket gates. In the distance, I could see the vermillion temple arch, my gaze completely entranced. I somehow managed to carry myself to the ticket gates, but my heart was still stuck there. I’m scared of passing through the ticket gate. If I take this final step, I won’t be able to come back. That this burning sensation in my chest, the odd excitement I feel, and the loneliness of my empty hand…would all disappear.
Right now, I’m about to break apart. I tried to tell myself that things were fine this way, but the regret of not having confessed stabbed me in the heart. Not knowing what to do, I sought help from Mayuko.
“Sorry to call you this late.”
‘It’s fine. So, how did it go?’
“…I couldn’t say it.”
‘Why?’
“The words wouldn’t come out…But, even if I confess now, it’d only trouble Tsuyoshi-kun, right?”
I was aware that I forced myself to sound cheerful, but Mayuko wouldn’t let that stand.
‘You moron! You still have to tell him! Today is your last chance!’
“You’re right, but getting a confession from the girl that’s going to vanish tomorrow…”
Mayuko waited a moment and then gave me a calm response.
‘You know, when you went crazy in your approaches on Tsuyoshi, I was a bit happy.’
“No way. You kept scolding me.”
‘I’m worried you’re too kind for your own good. You listen to everything the adults tell you, looking like you hold back every single time. But when it came to your feelings, you got really emotional, right? To the point you went crazy for a bit.’
“I didn’t really…”
‘I’m not trying to deny it. On the contrary, I’m glad I got to see you act a bit selfish. We’re still in high school, remember? Sometimes you can prioritize yourself.’
I wasn’t even aware that I was selfish. Was my desire to go out with Tsuyoshi-kun of that origin? Over the past two months, I always wanted to be selfish. But maybe I had always been selfish in that regard. Mayuko continued.
‘That’s why…you can’t run right at the end. Be selfish for your own good, Machika.’
“Can I really become selfish…?”
‘You’re quite wrong. A high school girl has always been selfish from the very start.’
I audibly gulped. A feeling I had kept under control now broke free, filling my entire body.
“But I already split up with Tsuyoshi-kun.”
‘Then chase after him.’
That’s reckless. But even so, I had to. I had to do it today, as this is my final chance. Don’t be afraid. Run.
“Thanks, Mayuko. I’m going.”
‘Get ‘em, tiger.’
“Yep!”
I put my phone away and ran atop the asphalt with my geta clocks. The first step I took made the pain at my feet stronger. Yet when the second one followed, all the pain vanished. My yukata was getting messy from the running, and my hair was falling apart. But even so, I kept on running. My heart and body were moving in the same direction. Both restless, both excited. Right now, I had no plan in mind. No lie to make up. I just ran through the wind while being the way I was. I took a right at the place Tsuyoshi-kun and I split up and headed for the bus stop. Despite the darkness around us, I spotted a single shadow walking down the empty street. It’s the familiar back I kept looking at all evening. I temporarily stopped and took a deep breath.
“Tsuyoshi-kun!”
He slowly turned around, but his face was opposite from the street light, I couldn’t guess his expression. I took a step forward to close the distance between us, when I was reminded of the pain. Even so, I tried to take another step. The pain overwhelmed me and I had to stomp on the ground with my other foot. Finally, after a brief moment, Tsuyoshi-kun’s face was right in front of me. I took a few deep breaths and opened my mouth. But the words wouldn’t come out. I had my mind full of running, I didn’t think about what to tell him.
I’m allowed to be selfish. That’s what Mayuko told me. I can stay the way I am. So be selfish, me. However, before I was given a chance to speak, Tsuyoshi-kun raised his voice first.
“S-Sako-san?!”
My voice was completely erased.
“Your foot is all bloody!”
***
For a second, I thought Sako-san who appeared was a hallucination. However, when she approached me further with such a bewildered expression, I was reminded that this was reality. She took a step forward and completely lost her balance. At that moment, I realized that something was off about Sako-san. The color of her geta strap on one foot looked different…It was only darkness around us except the faint light from the street lamp, but I could tell immediately. The strap was colored red from the blood of her foot.
“S-Sako-san?! Your foot is all bloody!”
It was a wound that didn’t just look like a cut. She’s probably been ignoring it for a while now. I remembered Takumi’s advice. ‘It’s easy to get hurt with unfamiliar footwear, so be mindful of that. Always keep a band-aid on you.’ I should have realized this a lot sooner. Even without that advice, her weird way of walking should have been obvious to me. This is big trouble. I thought that I managed to make the date somewhat of a success, but I didn’t even pull off the bare minimum. My apologetic feelings towards Sako-san made my chest burn up. But this isn’t the time to reflect on it, I first have to give her some first-aid.
“Sit down there and wait! I’ll grab some wet tissues!”
I made Sako-san sit down on the nearby stone fence, and ran towards the public toilet.
I reached the toilet, and while preparing for the first-aid, I realized that today’s date was an absolute failure. The reason for that was simple. I was trying to act strong, trying to act cool by using the advice Takumi gave me. Because I only relied on that, I hurt Sako-san.
If I hadn’t gotten any advice and just went on the date normally, I would have surely caught on to Sako-san’s injury. Anyway, my way of doing the date today clearly backfired. It’s just as Takumi said. I shouldn’t try to erase the height difference between us.
It’s true that there’s a difference in caliber between me and Sako-san. But if I don’t accept that, we won’t be able to move forward. Even my current clothes are banned from now on. And with that decision made, it’s time to clear up the misunderstanding between the two of us. On the day Sako-san confessed to me, I restrained her by calling her perfect. So I have to take responsibility. I grabbed a bundle of wet tissues and hurried back to Sako-san.
Returning to the stone fence, Sako-san still sat there with her head hanging low, looking at her reddened foot.
“Sorry for the wait.”
“…It’s fine. I’m sorry to bother you like this.”
I controlled my breathing as I approached Sako-san, crouching down at her feet. I gently took off her geta clogs, to which the dried blood broke off. Sako-san let out a faint ‘Ouch!’ groan.
“Sorry! Did that hurt?”
“I’m okay. Not much you can do about it…”
Her entire foot was bloody, I couldn’t tell where the exact wound was. I was forced to simply but gently rub the general area. While doing so, I threw the words I just prepared at her.
“I have something like a request for you, Sako-san. Can we go to another summer festival?”
“Err, yeah……Why?”
“I can’t really describe it. It’s not like I wasn’t having fun today, but I’d like a retry, because that would make it even more fun.”
“I-I! I did have fun…but…”
I could hear a wave of uncertainty beaching in Sako-san’s voice. I don’t want to deny what happened today. But even so, nothing will change if we aren’t honest with each other.
“And there’s something I need to apologize for. After you invited me to this summer festival, I immediately got advice from Takumi. Asking how to best escort you, and stuff like that.”
I managed to remove the dried blood, revealing the red wound.
“This is my first time heading out somewhere with a girl, so I was worried. As a result, I studied a lot about how to make you happy. So my attitude today is probably not who I truly am.”
I gently put a fresh and wet tissue on the wound.
“At the same time, I need to resolve the misunderstanding. I know it was my fault for phrasing things the wrong way, but you were acting to destroy your perfect image, no? Because I said ‘You’re too perfect so I can’t go out with you,’ right?”
Sako-san’s body twitched gently in pain at me touching the wound and spoke up with a worried voice.
“…You knew about all of it?”
“Only recently. That’s why…I’m sorry. I also knew when you were lying to me today.”
After the wound looked a lot cleaner, I took out a band-aid. I gently touched Sako-san’s foot, when her feet rolled up like she was ticklish.
“You knew I wore a yukata on purpose?”
“Yep.”
“That I like sweet stuff too?”
“You love pudding, right?”
“Even that I cut my bangs in a clumsy wait on purpose?”
“I think they look great on you.”
After I covered most of the wound with the band-aid, I carefully put it on with a three-layered one. It probably will still hurt, but it’s better than before. I helped her put on the geta again, then looked up at Sako-san.
“I know I started this entire mess because I called you perfect, but I think we should both be more natural around each other. I thought about it a lot, but I want to properly face you head-on. I want us to get along in a natural way…and I want us to be even closer than before…”
I immediately realized what embarrassing things I was saying, with my face burning up. Sako-san smiled, too.
“You’re amazing, Tsuyoshi-kun. You thought about what you wanted to do and told the other person…”
“It’s not anything special, really. So…how about we go to another summer festival next weekend? Then we can both be ourselves, right?”
“If you ask me that, then I can’t say no…”
“Of course, only if you’re fine with it. I won’t force you.”
“No, I’m really happy. I can see that you’re really thinking about me. So let’s go to the summer festival.”
Even though she accepted my invitation, something felt off about Sako-san’s smile. It’s like she forced herself because she was about to break apart. Did she realize something? But what…Oh yeah, now that I think about it.
“Why did you come back to the temple anyway? Did you forget something?”
Sako-san dropped her gaze down on her knees.
“…There’s something I want to tell you, but it’s okay now. Don’t worry about it.”
Something she wants to tell me? There’s really only one thing. I probably put a halt to Sako-san’s second confession.
“U-Um…could I be the one to say it? After we enjoy yourselves during the festival next week…I’d like to be the one to confess……”
“…………Is that a promise?”
“Yep, a promise. I’ll look for another festival next week.”
“That’s a promise then…Even if it has to happen next year.”
I was a bit caught up on that last part of what she said, but it’s already decided. If the next date goes well, I’ll be the one to confess.
“I’m going home now. Thanks for your help.” Sako-san stood up, turning her back towards me as she started walking.
“I don’t want you to get hurt again, so I’ll take you to the—”
“I’m fine. I’ll be home soon.”
I tried to follow after Sako-san, but there didn’t seem any problem with the way she walked, so I didn’t chase after her.
“Be careful, okay? I’ll contact you again once I decide on a day.”
“Yep, see you soon.” Sako-san gently waved her hand at me, walking ahead once more.
From behind, I could see her hair being ruffled up, her hairpin having loosened.
August 8th,
I’m not good enough.
I couldn’t become selfish.
[1 Day Left.]
CClaw Translations 