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The Stray Sheep and Chicken Me
A white light tickled my eyes, with an unfamiliar chandelier hanging on the ceiling. Met with this dazzling scenery in front of my eyes, I awakened.
“…Ouch.”
Intense pain made all of my body hurt. Bandages were covering my body. I don’t know who did it, but someone was kind, careful, and thorough with my treatment, and even had me change back to my normal clothes. Well, leaving aside my gratitude for this fact, where is this?
I put on my glasses next to the pillow (which were luckily fixed by someone), pushed up my upper body, and looked around. I saw luxurious furniture with an elegant carpet. It’s like one of those castle rooms that would appear in fairy-tales. I was located in the middle of this, on top of a fluffy bed.
“Yo, finally awake?”
I heard a husky voice coming from the corner of the room. The person had their hair properly styled-up, wearing silver-rimmed glasses—Konoe Nagare. Like a bird of prey, Konoe’s father glared at me.
“How’s it going, your body still hurting, you romcom bastard?”
“Romcom…What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Huh? You pushed down my daughter in an empty science room, touched her breasts, and then got a nosebleed. Only some bastard out of a romcom would experience that kind of thing.” Konoe Nagare’s shoes clacked as he walked along the floor.
Seriously, how young is he? He has to be in his late thirties, but looks like he is in his twenties. Did he do this thanks to plastic surgery?
“You best be thankful to Kanade-ojousama. If not for her, you would have been sent to the garbage collection at haste. Also, your injuries aren’t that big of a deal, really. No broken bones, so your recovery is coming along just fine.”
“Just fine…Weren’t you the guy who did this to me in the first place?”
Acting like he’s not the fault of this.
“Don’t blame me, the plan was for you to lose consciousness after the first strike. You’re the one at fault for not going down with the first hit. I was forced to hold back in the end.”
“Stop lying. You were definitely hitting me with full force.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. I tried my best to hold back the urge of slicing you to pieces. Holding back from killing you was tough work.”
Yeah, I probably won’t ever be able to get along with this guy. That was my very first impression now. Konoe Nagare looked down at me. He wore a black vest with tight pants, together with a stiff necktie. This must be his attire as a butler, but it equally fit him painfully well even without that.
Since he looks like that, I must be at the Suzutsuki Family’s residence right now. As expected, you can tell how rich they are. It’s honestly terrifying.
“…What about Kureha?”
“Rest assured, she’s sleeping in the room next to this. The scenario was for her to not get hurt in the first place.”
“……”
Scenario, huh. I knew it, it was all just a plot put together by Suzutsuki—It was nothing but a staged kidnapping. As for the reason why they would go through such trouble…
“Hey, can I ask one thing?”
“What? I might listen to your request as long as it’s not ‘Please let me call you Father’, alright?”
“…Why the hell would I call you that? What kind of person do you think I am?”
“An insect clinging to my beloved daughter. If there was some pesticide that would work against you, I’d make sure to spray that all over the world.”
You damn helicopter parent. It seems like he really can’t stand my guts. Well, not like I care, I feel the exact same way. How could I respect an adult who emits such clear evil intent.
“Old man, even if I somehow ended up marrying Konoe, I definitely will never call you father. Old fart is plenty for you.”
“Fight’s on, you shitty brat. I’d rather die than have you call me father. And, even if the world were to end, you will never get my adorable Subaru.”
Konoe Nagare…No, that old man just nonchalantly flicked me off. When I retaliated by pointing my thumb down, he just gave me an annoyed ‘Hmpf’.
“I’ll be perfectly honest, I hate your guts.”
“No worries, the feeling’s mutual.”
“Aren’t you confident, you shitty brat.”
“You’re running out of words, you damn helicopter parent.”
Sparks were flying between the two of us. I wanted to ask about the whole incident at the leisure land, but I can’t be bothered now. I’m more invested in our battle now. A surprise attack is best, as whoever strikes first, wins…I need to finish this in one fell swoop.
“You two seem to be getting along quite well. Would you mind letting me join in?”
As we spent our time glaring at each other, the door to the room opened, and a familiar voice reached my ears—It’s Suzutsuki. She was wearing the same clothes I met her in this morning.
“Nagare, you can leave now.”
“Understood, Kanade-ojousama.”
The old fart devotedly lowered his head towards Suzutsuki, and left the room. Hm, that’s a butler for you, he will act humble and polite in front of his master at least.
“He’s not a bad person, you know. Just loses his overview on things a bit once Subaru is involved.”
“That’s a bit, huh…I don’t know what you’re seeing, but he’s clearly crazy over his own daughter. At this rate, he’ll never let her get married.”
I’ve seen him cling to his own daughter like he’s crazy. I feel like that old guy is way too protective. Can’t even imagine having someone as clingy as him as a father.
“But, Nagare kind of resembles you, Jirou-kun.”
“…Wha?”
What is that woman saying? He and I are supposed to be similar? What other common ground do we have except that we wear glasses?
“You sure do. About the part where you really treasure your family. Well, Nagare only has Subaru as his family, so he’s just a tad bit more protective than you are.”
“Only Konoe?”
Oh yeah, what about her mother…
“Subaru’s mother passed away when she was five years old. Her body had always been fragile, so Subaru’s birth put a large strain on her body…”
“………”
Add to that that Konoe doesn’t have any siblings either. Makes sense that she couldn’t give birth to any children in that state. Even though I bet she wanted to leave behind a boy as well.
“Thinking about it, that was around the time Subaru grew obsessed with becoming my butler. The people from my family urged Nagare to get married again, but Subaru started crying and begged them not to, saying ‘I don’t need a new Mom!’, you see. She must have been scared that her own mother’s existence would vanish entirely.”
—I need to be the young lady’s butler no matter what.
That’s what Konoe told me back when we talked in the infirmary…Just as Suzutsuki said, she might have wanted to protect the existence of her mother by continuing to be a butler. That’s why she’s that desperate…
“But—reality wasn’t as kind as that.” She showed a beturbed tone. “Because of that abduction happening at the leisure island, Subaru became afraid of knives. Ever since then, those two feelings were colliding inside of her. For one, her desire to continue being my butler, and at the same time, her insecurity and worry if she was even allowed to be my butler in the first place.”
Her feelings of wanting to honor her mother by continuing to be a butler, and her guilt of not being able to protect her master because of her phobia…What a dilemma, seriously. And, she’s been caught between these two all this time?
“We tried our hardest to fix that phobia of hers, but nothing worked. Honestly speaking, I lost count on how many times I was about to tell her to quit.”
However, now she feels glad that she didn’t. That’s what I picked up from Suzutsuki’s gaze.
“Your encounter with Subaru was the greatest chance for us. By being around you, someone who suffers from a phobia as well, she might be able to overcome hers—is what we thought.”
“That’s why…you had Konoe help fix my phobia.”
“Exactly. However, it didn’t quite work out after all. I’m sure there was a slight change after she started helping, but her phobia of knives didn’t improve much. That’s why—we decided on a different approach.”
“Which was the kidnapping incident today…”
“Hyahahaha! That’s correct, Jirou-kun.” I heard the voice of the wolf again.
Looking over, Suzutsuki held a small machine in front of her mouth, as she started talking.
…So that vexing voice came from that woman after all…If I had to guess, that mask probably had some speaker implemented into it, and the room they were locked in had surveillance cameras, watching my every movement. I guess that was necessary so that Konoe wouldn’t figure out that the kidnapper was actually that old fart.
“As expected, the plan worked out. Her friends and master were put into danger, which is what forced her to overcome her own phobia. Well, it’s not all gone at this point, but that definitely was an important first step.”
“…Not to mention that your relationship with Konoe got fixed as well.”
For crying out loud, how manipulative can she be. She used both me and Kureha as much as she wanted, all simply to fix Konoe’s phobia.
“That’s right. I really…am thankful to you two. Because of you, Subaru can stay as my butler.” Suzutsuki showed a polite bow, as she gave me her gratitude.
…Shit. So we’ve been dancing on the top of her palm this entire time. That sure is annoying. If she’d just told me, I would have helped.
“You really can’t complain about her old man. When it comes to Konoe, you’re not looking at the people around you either.” I was practically complaining with a sharp tone.
However, she instead just let out a snicker.
“You’re right. I love Subaru after all.”
“…Huh?”
Love? That sure is an odd way to phrase things. It’s like she’s actually seeing Subaru as a romantic interest…
“It’s true, Subaru was my first love.”
“……”
……I mean, what is this person saying? You’re telling me to just accept that? She’s saying it with an oddly serious expression, but that has to be acting, right. Yeah, this wolf girl wouldn’t just throw in a random coming-out, right…
“Oh, since you’re here already, why don’t you stay for dinner? I will call for you once the preparations are completed.” Suzutsuki said, and walked towards the door without even waiting for my response.
However, right before she stepped outside, she turned around.
“Jirou-kun, we’ll be trying our hardest to make sure your gynophobia gets fixed. If not, then I wouldn’t be able to call it even. Thanks to you, Subaru can continue working as my butler. And, more than anything…”
—Thank you for becoming her friend.
She smiled, and left the room…That’s not fair. This is clearly a red card. She’s making my heart race endlessly. She was hella cute. Showing me such a carefree expression…Waah, what should I do? Something precious inside of me will break.
And there, as I was agonizing over this attack, someone knocked on the door.
“I’m coming in, Jirou.” Konoe’s alto voice reached me even through the door.
She was wearing a similar butler’s uniform like that old fart before. Yeah, she looks pretty dignified. I knew it’d look much better on her than on that old guy……Wait a second? Why are there…red spots on her uniform? I can see some red dots here and there scattered on her white shirt, looking like blood…
“Ah, this? It’s not that big of a deal. I just had my father take some notes.”
“Eh?”
“No need to worry, I avenged you, Jirou.”
“…Huh.”
“Also, I told him ‘I hate you, father!’ right up to his face.”
“……”
Um, did she do that to make up for the fact that I was beaten to a pulp? I mean, I’m happy about that, I guess, but now I’m starting to feel a bit worried about that old fart. He won’t hang himself just because his daughter said that to his face, right.
“More importantly, does your body still hurt, Jirou?”
“Well, here and there. But, I’m used to this, so I’ll be better in no time.”
I always recovered fairly quickly from my injuries. It’s a blessing in disguise because of my family. Still, did Konoe come over here because she was worried about me? As I thought, she really is a good person.
“I see. I’m glad to hear that. If your injuries were too grave, you wouldn’t be able to fulfill your promise.”
“Promise?”
“Yeah, you said ‘I’ll do whatever you want me to after this’, right?” Konoe showed a somewhat invigorating smile.
……Oh crap. I’m getting the shivers. I mean, I did say that, but…that was just in the heat of the moment, so you don’t have to take it this seriously…!
“A-Ahahaha, don’t be like that, Konoe, that was just some verbal promise…”
“‘Konoe’? What are you talking about, Jirou.” She flashed a bright smile. “Right now, I’m not ‘Konoe’, I’m ‘young lady’, right. You are currently under absolute control of mine, so don’t forget that.”
“……”
Um, you’re joking right, Konoe-san? I was really hoping for that, but the atmosphere she gave off seemed to fully disagree with me. This is bad, her eyes are serious. Damn it, to think I’d sign my own death because of such a stupid phrase…!
“I-I understand, my lady.” Pressed by the fear, I could only do as I was told.
“Alright, that’s better. With this, you don’t have any right to disobey me, understand.”
“Yes…that is correct, young lady.”
“Meaning, you’re prepared to bear with any kind of pain I might be inflicting on you, right?”
Eeeeek! Don’t say that with such a straight face! What do you mean by any kind of pain!? Do you hold that much of a grudge against me!?
“What is it? Are you? Or are you not?”
“I am! I am ready to accept whatever awaits me!” I frantically nodded along.
I mean, how can I say NO in this kind of situation? Yes yes yes, it is. Ahh, dear god, please save me. At least don’t make her torture me.
“Then, here I come. Don’t move.”
“…Y-Yes.”
Ahhhhh, she’s definitely going to punch meeee! Or so I thought, but as if to betray my expectations, a different sensation enveloped my body. I felt something soft touching my skin, together with the sweet fragrance of flowers tickling my nose. When I carefully opened my eyes, I spotted Konoe Subaru right in front of me. Konoe was clinging to my body.
“K-Konoe…?”
I subconsciously called her like I always would, but no retort came back. In all honesty, this was more impactful than being hit directly. Konoe—had her face buried in my chest, sobbing.
“…Idiot.” She muttered with a quivering voice. “I-I was scared…Really, really scared…”
“………”
Scared. Yeah, she must be talking about the whole knife thing. Of course, that makes perfect sense. Konoe suffered from a big trauma after all. Even if she did it to protect Suzutsuki, standing her ground against that trauma must have been hard for her.
“…Don’t cry, Konoe.” I tried my best to cheer her up. “You managed to protect Suzutsuki, didn’t you? You’re not a failure anymore. Even your fear of knives, you’ve started to conquer it, right.”
There, Konoe raised her head. Her eyes, wet from her tears, glared at me.
“That’s not it.”
“…Eh?”
Met with these words, I was left baffled. That’s not it? What? So she wasn’t scared because of the knife?
“You’re wrong! Absolutely wrong! That’s not what I was scared about! What I really was terrified of was…!”
—That you will disappear from my side, Jirou.
That’s what she said, as large grains of tears ran down her cheeks.
“Back when…I woke up next to the pool, do you know how I felt? What do you think I went through when I realized you went to save the other two alone, leaving me behind?”
“……”
“I was terrified. Full of fear. Thinking that you’d leave me behind, thinking that I won’t ever be able to see you again. W-What…what if you got stabbed by that knife while I was sleeping…!”
“……”
“W-When I was thinking that, I got scared…Worried that the first friend I ever got at school would die without me being able to do anything…Just the thought of that…!”
“…Konoe.” I gently embraced her shaking back.
Something told me that I had to do that.
“Sorry, it was my fault.”
“…I-Idiot. Even if you apologize…I definitely won’t forgive you…!”
Her hair was graceful as it shook, and even her acting tough seemed weak. Sitting in front of me wasn’t the strong and cool Subaru-sama who fought the big bad wolf while dealing with her trauma. She was just a normal girl. Small, slender, and fragile enough that I was worried about breaking her with my hug.
“Idiot…idiot idiot…” Konoe continued to sob, burying her face in my chest again.
—I want to protect her. That’s what I thought. I want to protect Konoe…protect this girl. But, in order to achieve that, I’m not good enough right now. I’m weak. I’m covered in bandages. I was beaten to a pulp this easily. How weak am I…
“—!”
That’s why I need to become stronger. So that she won’t have to worry about me…So that she won’t ever have to cry again. No matter what danger might come, I’ll become strong enough to protect her at my side…
“…Ah.”
I see. I finally understand it, Pops. Those final words you left me behind…Stand By Me. I want you to stay by my side. I need to become a man who will let people precious to me say that. I need to become strong enough to protect the people important to me. I need to be strong enough to be able and say ‘I’ll protect you, so stay with me’.
“Jirou…” The girl quietly raised her head.
Her face was riddled with tears, her eyes transparent as they reflected my own face. We were at a distance where our lips could touch at any second. Because of her beautiful appearance, I swallowed my breath—and that’s when it happened.
“Woah!?”
My field of view suddenly turned red. My nose was bleeding. The red liquid I’ve been trying hard to keep in all this time…now came gushing out.
“A-Are you okay, Jirou? This is why I asked you if you were okay with pain…” Konoe moved away from me, bringing me tissues.
…Man, right when we had a good atmosphere going…Just, don’t treat me like some chicken bastard. I really tried my best to hold back this entire time. But, this is my limit. I mean…you know? I don’t think I can ever see Konoe as a man again…
Right as I tried to stop the blood from gushing out of my nose, the door opened at a fearsome speed, with no prior knocking. Wondering what the buzz was about, I turned towards the door, only to spot Kureha.
“A-Are you okay, Konoe-senpai?!” Kureha beautifully ignored me, and instead dashed towards Konoe.
Wow, I really don’t feel the love here. Despite me being severely more injured, and bleeding from my nose, she doesn’t care.
“I heard from Onee-sama! She said that ‘Jirou-kun might be violating Subaru right about now’, you know! Ah…Konoe-senpai, your eyes are so red…You must have been scared. Let’s start a victims’ meeting!”
That damn Devil Suzutsuki. Going around lying again. Also, I’m the biggest victim here, so let me join.
“Also, Nii-san! I can’t believe you went to seduce Konoe-senpai when I was about because of anemia, despite going out with Onee-sama!”
“…Anemia?”
Ah, I see. That’s another of Suzutsuki’s lies. So that Kureha doesn’t know about this entire plot, she beautifully covered up the truth.
“Calm down, my little sister, you’re just being deceived by that woman.”
“H-How cruel! Not even putting trust in your own lover, you’re a failure as a human being!”
Hey now, what are you saying while I’m listening? Also, this situation is dangerously bad. Kureha seems ready to hammer a chair on my head. I need to do something…
“Hey, Jirou.”
There, the silent butler spoke up again.
“What was that about you going out with the young lady?”
“…Oh shoot.”
Now that I think about it, we kept the fact of me and Suzutsuki being a fake couple a secret from her, right? Crap, I got a really bad feeling about this.
“Huh…I see, so you and the young lady share this kind of relationship, Jirou…” A voice overflowing with rage tickled my ears.
The air around me froze up. It felt like a cold breeze passed me by inside this room.
“I-I need to kill you right now…To think you would lay your hands on Kana-chan…You need to be removed from this earth before you dare come back to life a second time…!” Konoe had her face cast down, showing an awfully cold smile.
……I’ll be killed. No mistaking it, she’s out for blood. The second my body realized this, I jumped off the bed.
“Ah! Nii-san is running away!”
Of course I would! This mansion is haunted! I need to leave as quickly as possible!
“Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!”
Together with a war cry, I jumped through the window of the room. The sky was colored orange from the setting sun. As I jumped down from the second floor, my downfall was illuminated by the warm sun.
“Ooooooooh!?”
I was skydiving for about three meters. Albeit being terrified at this unexpected height, I somehow managed to safely land on the ground. The wild grass below acted as a wonderful cushion. Opening up in front of me was a large garden, looking like a wide sports park. Alright, next up is how to actually make it out of this place…!
“Oh my, aren’t you quite energetic.”
The second I started running, I heard a voice I would have rather not picked up. Despite being terrified, I turned towards the person who even brought me into this situation in the first place—
“I was waiting for you to jump out of that window, but…I didn’t expect things to work out this well.” The devil smiled happily.
This damn plotting wench…! Just how much more does she want to play with me before she’s satisfied…!
“Suzutsuki! You…You set me up, right!”
“What a horrible accusation. I just did what I thought would be best.”
“Thanks to that, I was about to lose my life!”
That’s right, the root of all evil is most definitely this wench. Now that’s come to this, I’ll keep giving you an earful until the very end, like a B-29. Otherwise, I won’t be able to rest in peace.
“Anyway, just come with me!”
“Eh?”
As Suzutsuki gave a baffled reaction, I just grabbed her arm and started running. Of course, only her arm, above her clothes. I don’t want to get a nosebleed while running.
“What are you planning on doing? Is this what they call a runaway marriage?”
“As if! You’re a hostage! If I tried running just like that, I’d get killed!”
If push comes to shove, I’ll use her to buy myself a ticket of freedom. I’m feeling like some villain in a midnight overseas drama. There won’t be any car chase happening, will there?
“Well, that’s fine and all, but…”
“What?”
“Um…Please don’t grab my arm this passionately…This is the first time a man has touched me like this…and it’s embarrassing…”
“You say that, after fully enjoying yourself at playing with my body, so don’t give me that crap!” I screamed, and ran through the grass.
There, I felt insane pressure run up my back. When I turned around, I spotted my little sister and classmate, glaring at me like two wild dogs—Kureha and Konoe. That group of two was chasing me, and screamed at the top of their lungs.
“Heeey! Stop right there, Nii-san! I’ll forgive you this once and send you down to hell!”
“So you’re trying to kill me!?”
“Jirouuu! Don’t think you can escape! I’ll use my memory erasing technique one more time on you!”
“I feel like I’ll remember my previous life more than anything!” I tried my best to hold back my urge of screaming in terror, and kept running as fast as I could.
If I get caught now, it’ll be a dead end for me. It’s pretty much like I’m being chased by death itself…!
“Ahaha.” Even as she was being pulled along, Suzutsuki laughed like a child. “Whenever you’re around, it never gets boring. I’m sure it’ll be as enjoyable as this every day.”
“Shut up, you wolf wench! This entire situation happened because of you! Because you keep spurting nonsense…!”
“Oh my, I’m speaking my heart here. For example—the part about Subaru being my first love.”
“Wha—”
When I turned to my side in shock, I spotted the girl sticking out her tongue, as she smiled at me. But, her cheeks were still faintly red……I give up. Butler, rich lady, and little sister…Thinking that I’ll have to spend the next two years like this makes me want to cry. Not even a week ago, I would have never imagined living my life like this…Can I really fix my gynophobia under such circumstances?
“…Damn it, what messed up nonsense.”
But, if there was one thing to say, it would be that my daily life won’t be getting boring anytime soon.
“…Alright.” Let me rephrase myself.
Filling my view was the setting sun, illuminating us and the sky with a reddish-orange color. In the midst of this, I screamed at the top of my lungs.
—Girls really are terrifying!
CClaw Translations 